Anastas
23.06.2004, 02:43
Hello. Several days ago I have buried the father of the son. To the son four and a half of a year and we about two years do not live with the daddy. Now at me another the man and we were going to to get married. But this all - in general. That me excruciates, so it is notions of compulsion, that or with the son something will occur or happen to me, as speak in people: the dead man will take away. That fact still or even leaves traces, that we were venchany and I lived with another the man on all church canons in a sin. I not so in it believe, but nevertheless. We have submitted the application or statement to the REGISTRY OFFICE and to us have appointed or nominated day of registration to December, 6th, and the father of my child (even there is an assumption, that he has committed suicide) on November, 4th was lost. He did not know about my forthcoming marriage and I myself convince, what is it concurrence (40 days will not pass or not take place also to us it is necessary to postpone registration of marriage or spoilage), but for the last year in my life there were too many concurrences. New year (leaving) I was going to to meet one on ball, and the son to bring to the grandmother (the groom remained to wait for me the house), but on December, 30th the son has got in hospital and ball, certainly for me has been excellent or cancelled. Later I was adjusted or set up to work and thus to earn good money, but I was brought down with the machine or car and I month have stayed on the sick-list. pozdee (in May) I made serious plans besides about job and all should develop (so spoke "strong" in our city), but the newspaper where I worked was closed also by all of us have remained without job. In the summer I planned to spend a lot of time with the son, but relatives have caused or called me to look after the dying grandmother. From long separation from mum the son had a phobia of loneliness. And here now in the autumn I was going to in marriage, than have inexpressibly pleased the young man and again terrible event. And the reasons for all event in leaving to year serious - illnesses or diseases and morses of people, failure or accident, unexpected cessation of work., that I always seemed to me the sensible person, to me already almost 32 years and me used to be gone through much, but such yet was not. I very much am afraid and I feel it physically. And to go to the psychiatrist here in city to me as though, even there is no time (vse-taki I again I work as the journalist and congestion at me is great). I do not know what to do or make... Perhaps, all will pass or take place in due course?
And more one problem. In the summer when I looked after the grandmother, I had strange problems with a dream. During the moment of transition from wakefulness in a dream I have something in an organism, namely any komok from area of a solar plexus as though vystrelivaet in a head. I, certainly, wake up, heart beats also it povtoorjaetsja again and again. At first it very much frightened me, but now I have got used and I concern to these "attacks" I can not sleep at the whole nights more easy though they on former proceed also I. The unique effective agent against them is an alcohol. And it is rather sad, because, opasaja attacks, I began to accept it or him often. Addressed here to the therapist, but at me have looked or seen as on idiotku and have advised to drink valerian drops or valokardin, having assumed (with a smile), that at me the cardioneurosis begins. Lady I high and not thin, that is make impression of absolutely healthy person which until recently and was. I do not know as to struggle with night attacks. I simply wish to sleep easy.
Thanks also forgive or excuse, if I have addressed not there. Anastas
And more one problem. In the summer when I looked after the grandmother, I had strange problems with a dream. During the moment of transition from wakefulness in a dream I have something in an organism, namely any komok from area of a solar plexus as though vystrelivaet in a head. I, certainly, wake up, heart beats also it povtoorjaetsja again and again. At first it very much frightened me, but now I have got used and I concern to these "attacks" I can not sleep at the whole nights more easy though they on former proceed also I. The unique effective agent against them is an alcohol. And it is rather sad, because, opasaja attacks, I began to accept it or him often. Addressed here to the therapist, but at me have looked or seen as on idiotku and have advised to drink valerian drops or valokardin, having assumed (with a smile), that at me the cardioneurosis begins. Lady I high and not thin, that is make impression of absolutely healthy person which until recently and was. I do not know as to struggle with night attacks. I simply wish to sleep easy.
Thanks also forgive or excuse, if I have addressed not there. Anastas