Tell or Say, whether the rights I or not? We have got married 3 months ago. Both we work. He...

[The wife]

Tell or Say, whether the rights I or not? We have got married 3 months ago. Both we work. He recently has organized the firm with friends. Those already have small children and they are married already more than ours)) But we have in family a stumbling-block. The matter is that I do not transfer or carry, when to us call after 22 one o'clock in the evening. ((and call ALWAYS to my husband. That the most awful, he every evening speaks or with the friends from job, or with the sister with mum. Well good, with mum and the sister they " share gossips " in day. Though the sister calls to him on cellular every day, that simply so poljaljakat. To Her simply to borrow or occupy there is nothing. But I do not understand drugogo-to him every evening one of its or his employees (with whom have organized business) calls and share the same gossips. Personally I consider or count, that these conversations can be discussed at job in the evening. Especially in them there is nothing important and urgent. Sometimes to him on cellular call in 7 8 mornings!!! (the truth in this case on business). I speak the husband, that these people do not respect with you and me if dare to break our rest! Sometimes they call even in TARGET!!! (((I exhaust on two (!) Jobs and study. I come home and even there I wish to find in the evenings rest and pobyt nakonets-that with liked alone!!! Really I have no on it the right??? Here imagine a situation which more than once took place to be. We make love... Phone also calls! The husband does not throw me during this moment, but the call at me beats off already any desire! If to disconnect or switch-off city ph. everyone call on cellular, which he is not going to to disconnect or switch-off! ((I do not know, I already twitch from any calls. I come not home where I am am waited with rest and silence, and to any secretary! ((((why he does not wish to explain to the friends, that after 22 to call without need indecently! That we wish to have a rest (even the wife). ((He will leave the employees at job, they part home and in an hour call up! I REFUSE TO UNDERSTAND IT!!!! As at office never happens lishchnih people at whom they cannot discuss all at job! These friends speak all, that at them the wife and small children, that to them to call it is impossible after 21 hours. And go and keep ringing to us after 22!!! WHAT to me TO DO or MAKE??? HOW to me With IT or THIS TO RECONCILE OR STRUGGLE??? (((((((

[JUju]

The wife, poor, you poor, was the same situation at me. I very much understand you.. These late calls have stopped only long and tiresome conversations. If these friends are close to you talk to them, or with their wives. Simply ask silence and rest after 22 uh, explain, that you early rise and in ten evenings already sleep.. Only long conversations can something change - an once - nothing will turn out! (we are married 6 years and it has stopped only recently, and you only 3 months ago!!:)) For so short term of your joint life you with the husband only originally get used to each other - you should do or make it ALL life!! Grinding in occurs or happens and on 30 ohm to year of a joint life - rare or infrequent pairs or steams understand and accept each other COMPLETELY!! You thought, what home life is a fairy tale?, there is no it job, at times very serious, but in fact for the sake of minutes of happiness and affinity, minutes of silence and a smile of your child, its or his first steps and words.. It costs or stands much. And why you rabotatete on 2 uh jobs? Can be to you lower the load? I think, that the woman should work, not exhausting, and in pleasure, and the husband should contain family, on its or his brachiums the basic prosperity, and the woman lays, working in pleasure, will be terpimee at home, hranitelnitsa the center and a cosiness.. By own experience I know - in home life the patience is necessary, much more, than it seems at first sight. Success and patience to you!!

[The wife for JUju]

Thanks for comprehension! I already spoke with it or him on this subject much, its or his daddy has squabbled with it or him even)) And he speaks, what why to not respond to phone if all of us peerly we do not sleep yet? He does not understand, that at me business of a principle! I already even speak him, that he as the woman sits on a tube and hours gossips! And he to me vu the answer, that he simply sociable! Know, there is such joke, just about my husband: " two women after 10 years or summer terms in prison nakonets-that send or have left on freedom... And more 2, 5 hours stood talked at hiluses of prison "! Both laughter and tears! (((can be to me instigate the girlfriends that to me called every day at 23 o'clock? And I with the happy face (as he) would fly to phone? But it seems to me, that it or him spokojstive and patience that will not break! He it will be simple to be pleased for me... ((

[JUju]

The wife, business of a principle - rotten business: ((muzhiks, as a rule consider or count, that principles are only at them. To prove and defend the principles it is possible in other. At me the husband same "talker" - constantly someone calls to him. For certain, you have the "zamorochki" which too irritate it or him - there are no ideal people! If he lives as wants, you too live so. A principle - " concern to people how you want, that they would concern to you ". But I shall repeat - in your case - grinding in to each other will occur or happen still very longly. PATIENCES to YOU!! Women as a rule are softer and are flexible or floppy, be the woman, and remove or take off from itself such working load! Is only harms:)

[The wife for JUju]

And again thanks!) as to THAT is not pleasant to him in me it is usual he to me about it or this I speak also at once I try to do or make how to him better. And as to job at it or him the firm only only starts to grow. I try to promote and I earn additionally tutoring with the child. Simply mum this child does not wish from me to refuse. When I prekratia employment or occupations iz-for changes of job, she could "live" half a year without me. Then ugovarilvala me to continue employment or occupations (English). So now I still am engaged with her and its or her husband on days off!)) Money to us while are necessary. And on z/p the husband which is unpredictable we to ane htim to live. All taki meanwhile mine z/p - a leg our seven. ((Unfortunately as to putting off or taking out from of a load and transition to domohozjajstvu here to me stirs or prevents one more moment-I very bad mistress. Unique my plus in this area, that I adore is tasty or delicious to prepare!!! And on a floor I do not pay attention to a mud and socks and I cross through all this silently)) I kredo-is business in which I am now dipped, am typed or collected experience and I grow. Therefore while even about the child to think I do not want. The idea that on neo it is necessary to spend all time and attention me kills)

[JUju]

The wife, I do not speak what to be the housewife! I simply speak what to remove or take off from myself a part of a load.. Here see, you speak, that work on days off. .dumaju, that your husband from it or this not in delight:) And I another, I adore cleanliness and the order, and have learned to cross through a dust and socks on a floor more recently:)) One I can tell or say precisely, that I would not marry, t. e. Would not began to legalize the attitude or relation until it was convinced, that the husband can contain family. Simply I have a mass of examples where the muzhik simply mounts upon a neck to wives and materjamm in the financial plan - t. e. They it is constant otkryvjut the business but why that constantly burn through or smash up, and wives and mothers should pay then debts.. I hope, it not your case. Think that all is possible or probable he not govoit, that in you is not pleasant to him. But when the wife SO works (on days off much and on 2 uh jobs + studies) at it or her simply does not remain forces (sincere and physical) on creation of a cosiness of the house, she starts to wait for it or this from the man (you wrote, that coming home you wait for rest). I think, that rest in the house, just frame women, and at you it is simple forces and to time for it does not remain.. To us was for 17 years with the husband when we have started to live separately from parents, have undersigned in 18, before wedding received the monetary help from parents from both parties or sides, but after wedding have refused. I only studied then was engaged in the house, the husband worked and studied. Have got out, have gone through. Now to us on 23. I work in the pleasure, washing z/p is not considered in the family budget. .t. e. I can easy spend it or her for myself, or on gifts, for example, naturally, any part leaves on products, but the basic income of family lays on the husband - he feels the muzhik, capable to support family:) I Think, that to your husband still hardly psychologically osoznovat, that he on you we depend in the financial plan. Here I perhaps, shall repeat, PATIENCES BOTH OF YOU!! You still so it is not enough together...

[The wife for JUju]

Well we receive both equally. Simply it or he a kind of activity such, that does not have fixed salary, and at me vse-taki stability. I often have a desire to talk to its or his friends. But I am afraid, that as a result I shall provoke a situation, that the husband will start to hide from me any calls and will start to say lies ((He threatens me it or this... ((

[JUju]

The wife.. For the first months of home life strange threats:) kak-that to me it is not clear a little..:) speak, if it is impossible to change situatsiju-it is necessary to change the attitude or relation to her. Try to react more easy to behaviour of the husband, in fact you marry it or him because like, accept its or his disadvantage, but gradually bring it or him to nothing:))

[The wife]

Yes JUju, probably I do not have choice more... (() thanks!) success to you!)

[Ksy]

To me it seems what is it to a trifle though I so che was indignant and behaved the first year after wedding. It not disrespect, simply your husband and its or his friends consider or count it normal, therefore for it or him your indignation looks or appears as a cavil, a whim.
But the first months simejnoj lives often happen difficult. Them it is necessary porozhit, it is necessary to learn or teach each other at a new level. I have cried the first 5 months. Villages then also has written on a leaf of a paper all that irritates me, then all that in itself to like me and as all its or his habits and (that is very important) a way of life in its or his family and my family. If to put such leaves series it is possible to find answers to questions and to solve that important. That would be clear, I shall give an example. Me terribly offended that he does not give me flowers. Then I have heard as its or his mum you to me spoke the husband Well what for flowers have dragged. They will soon wither and money has translated or transferred and where I now shall put them (business was at restaurant). You would buy or purchase to me a bottle of a champagne is better, I would receive more pleasures. And the truth, I never saw at them in the house of colors or flowers. To alter the person bezpolezno, I have ceased to take offence. But when he gives me flowers, I know that he does or makes it because so it is accepted namely because me it to like though he and does not understand why. One more example. He does not like that I went anywhere without it or him. I was indignant, he does not believe me, he watches or keeps up me and tp.. Then I have looked narrowly and have understood that he actually feels not in the plate when I was not present. Even knowledge of that that I in the house (in other room, but series) give him a quiet status throttle. For example it is pleasant to me to realize it. I all peerly meet girlfriends, but I do not shout at it or him when he does not wish me to release or let off, and I promise that nibud good, as a sweet to the child. On a sort of its or his activity its or his phone calls not only after 9 10 hours, and at any time in general.. Acts on nerves, believe. But. I do not respect with men which are not engaged in the career, do not provide family and not stremjatsja to be the best in that that they do or make. (And sometimes gossips with klientom-comrade in 2 one o'clock in the morning bring more advantage or benefit than week profesionalnyh vstrech). So the Wife,
Choose for itself the vital things, and the rest give up as hopeless or go on the compromise. It is ALL TRIFLES WHICH DO NOT COST or STAND NERVES And TEARS

[Nata]

Certainly struggle! Does not understand words - disconnect or switch-off phone or will throw out phone in a window! What patience - he " villages to you on a head " can be.

[The wife]

Thanks! I to tell the truth sometimes am am visited or attended with an idea that to me is simple any more to what to carp, here I and cling to these calls. Therefore as in the rest my husband simply present or true rarity though he does not give me flowers and does not speak compliments.)) whether therefore the first report I have begun according to " the rights I? " But all the same... SO it would be desirable to have a rest in the evening!!!

[C]

The rights! And to you it would be more pleasant, esliby and he divided or shared;parted your opinion and so either reconcile silently or struggle!

[C]

The rights! And to you it would be more pleasant, esliby and he divided or shared;parted your opinion and so either reconcile silently or struggle!